GW34: It was just another Man U, Monday! 🤗🌈🗓️

*Mike Impression*:  It's Chewsday, innit la! 😂 

Never gets old, never gets old. Well I'll certainly consider myself appetized for the main event tomorrow between Atleti and Arsenal after some of high quality football courtesy of Bayern and PSG. What. a. game. 9 goals in leg 1 is craaaazy 😱😱😱😱😱

But if you think Tuesday games are fun, just wait til you've experienced the thrill of a league Monday game to stay top 5! Without further ado, it's the GAMEWEEK 34 RECAP!!

But First...FPL Cup Rd 2 Results!! 🏆 

Fool commish once, shame on me. Fool commish twice, and I'll never be fooled again! Let's see how everyone did in rd 2 of the cup! Congrats to those that have made it to the illustrious round of 16! Tough breaks for Bebz FC & Kevans!

Biiiiig round of 16 otw! Remember, whoever loses between me and Niall has to write 38 articles next season!

Now let's see how everyone did in this mini week as only FOUR WEEKS REMAIN!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!🥹🥹🥹

Week in Review

Sunderland (0) - Nottingham Forest (5)

Wow, veeeeery unexpected and impressive W from Forest to go 5 clear from the relegation line with 4 to go. It's looking like a fight to the death between Spurs and West Ham to close out the season👀👀👀

Fulham (1) - Villa (0)

The fight for Europa League and Conference league is reaaaally heating up. Big 3 points from Fulham to stay in contention. Villa now in 5th but 8 pts safe on Brighton to likely secure the CL this year.

Liverpool (3) - Crystal Palace (1)

Now that the pressure is off, Isak seems right at home scoring relatively meaningless goals in a solid result for Pool. Top 5 looks all but secured pending an absolute meltdown. Nice goal for the road from Mr. Robbo! Even Wirtz got on the board, SLOT IN!

West Ham (2) - Everton (1)

Everton really taking one for the team here in an absolute defiant W from the Hammers. Drama filled game with an a last min winner from none other than Callum Wilson to secure the W. 4 games to go to stay up, can they hold their composure with Brentford, Arsenal, Newcastle, and Leeds to go. Time. will. tell. Shouts to Dewsbury Hall for the goal. Bowen masterclass as well.

Tottenham (1) - Wolves (0)

Extremely needed W for the Spurs faithful and Paulinha barely stays onside to get Tottenham the massive 3. Unfortunately, they lost Simons to a knee injury which could impact how this all shakes out. 4 games to go and 2 points back on West Ham. Villa, Leeds, an ice cold Chelsea, and Everton stand in their way to salvage what could be the most catastrophic downfall we've seen from a Europa league champion.

Arsenal (1) - Newcastle (0)

I will save my 4th consecutive Lmaaaao 😂 to myself as this shit ain't funny Newcastle, DO YOUR MF JOB!! For all the fire Arsenal came out with against City, this was quite underwhelming. Good to see Nick Pope back to his usual hijinks. Another L for Lcastle as Arsenal return back to the top...for now! But I have a feeling goal differential will come back to bite them! Hoping Newcastle did juuuust enough to exhaust them, those lads look tired!!!👀👀👀

Welp, that recaps the weekend and that'll do it for the...wait a minute! What's that chorus of gleeful cheer I hear echoing. It's the resounding buzz still resonating from the Man U Boys from Manchester Monday! Take it away boys! 🎶

Man U (2) - Brentford (1)

Bruno is on FIRE🔥🔥🔥, he may actually get the record!! Old man Casemiro is going out in style! And Sesko is bagging goals relatively consistently. The Man U boys used to dream of games like this as CL is juuuust about guaranteed for the first time in 2 years.

Galaxy Brain Plays of the Week 🌌🧠

• MGW transferers, riiiiiise! Solid 13 from the lad

• Arsenal defenders + Raya players, shoulda been a no brainer against Newcastle!

• Bowen truthers, nice lil 10 and a W

• Wirtz watchers, getting a goal, nice!

• Cheeky Casemiro players, nicely down, which leads up to our....

Top Dawg ⬆️🐶

Fulmetal Midfielder - 75 pts

Ed Ed Ed, nice to see ya back in a top dawg spot, welcome back!!! Veeeeery strong week for Mr. Ed with massive points from Raya (10), Andersen (11), Gabriel (8), Casemiro (12), Bruno (10), Anderson (9) and topping it all off with a Bowen (10). Nice lil consolation trophy for another Real Madrid blank season!

Bottom Dawg ⬇️🦮

Lemme Leopards - 13 pts

The Real Madrid boys really giving the the opposite ends of the spectrum this week. Shambolic week from James, who hopefully skips this article as well, to put up what may be a season low to follow up Scott's season high last week. Truly musty things from a guy who shoulda used a chip. Behold!